Nastyville

For all the recent press on Nashville’s growing status as an “it” city, as “Nowville”, etc, there is one thing that the articles might be missing. In fact I am sure there are many things these articles are missing. They don’t tend to be complex reflections of the complex reality of Nashville, but are marketing tools, trying to help boost Nashville’s status. They remind me of what often bothers me about other people when I interact with them – overconfidence and a lack of ease and slowness for proper introspection.

The one thing that these articles are missing can be best summarized in one word…..”Nastyville.”

This is a term coined by the illustrious coffee drinker and local public intellectual, Maurice Kuttab. Many have of course heard about East Nasty, but few realize that the city itself on a whole has some nasty characteristics that are not brought up nearly often enough. I for one just don’t have the energy to exude (or ooze) enough positivity to keep my awareness of this nastiness at bay! How bout a bit of airing of grievances?

Grievance no.1 – Passive aggression. it is rampant, everywhere, it drives me totally bonkers.

Grievance no.2 – The sweet smell of the sewer as it fills the air outside of Fido in Hillsboro Village. Is there some strange addictive substance wafting out of that sewer? I swear it is addictive! I think it also makes me hungry. This is quite a conundrum for me, as I can’t indulge in this delicious setting to eat and hang out due to being banned, for of all things, playing the violin. Although it is still rather unclear to me why….I asked for clarification and the owner did not offer any.

Grievance no.3: No city wide composting! If we are serious about being sustainable and environmentally friendly as a city we should have city wide mandated compost pickup like San Francisco. That would be freaking awesome.

Grievance no. 4: Song Writer’s nights. I really don’t want to listen to most of the songwriters I hear at these things. Wouldn’t you go out more if you were being Serenaded by say, a String Quartet rather than what you hear at a song writer’s night? I just get really bored at people singing and playing guitar.  There are occasional glimmers of originality, but I’m not sure they make up for it. Furthermore, since most of these events are low or no cost for bars and restaurants, no one wants to pay musicians to play at their establishments, and what is considered music by patrons and owners is really limited.

Grievance no.5:  Allergens.  Yes Nashville is one of the most allergen filled cities in the world.  We literally live in a bowl full of all sorts of things that keep us constantly plugged up.

Grievance no.6: Weather: Although warmer than my hometown of Buffalo, NY, Nashville has huge and quick fluctuations of weather to a degree that if you live here there is a definite Bi-Polar aspect to your bodies personality (now add that onto passive aggression and that alone creates a lot of nastiness.).

Grievance no.7:  Keeping up appearances and being nice.  The most obvious example is the phrase, “oh isn’t that sweet,” or something like that, hiding your seething hatred behind words of cloying damp niceness.

Grievance no. 8: Inept service staff…..all those songwriters singing at the songwriters nights, well they are the service staff for the food industry in this city…and their artistic ego’s are sometimes too much work to deal with!  But than I am sure I can be a lot of work to deal with as well!

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